something in my life has to give.. either the wedding gig thing has to go or party city or both and do something totally different... what I want to do is photograph but reality check tells me that i need to earn money or sell all my shit and go on an adventure... I dont hate my life, but I cant seem to focus in on my goals. I cant seem to find my balance... even though it was a struggle at times just doing the hair and makeup I was happy and had plenty of time to focus in on my art... now I feel trapped like ive commited my life to all of these things and all I really want to do is run away LOL. I mean Im 41 for goodness sake.. and I still dont know what I want to be when Im grown up LOL Oh yeah Im grown up now wtf!
I think I need a vacation or something!
go someplace that noone knows me and just chill for a few days and see if i can find my clarity...
6 comments:
You're doing fine Anna... thats just the way the Rat Race is....
LOL ya think? well how the hell can people do this everyday? for thier entire lives? its so frustrating... LOL i think i have been spoiled with my other career choices... go in , do my thing , make my money and go home.
Im gonna sit down with my boss at party city tonight and have a serious talk with him about how i feel about it all.
ill let yall know what happens.
I would wait until My business picks up a bit this way You can deliver an ultimatum.
Well, I guess I'll have to add my 2 cents too.
Here goes ...I know it's difficult to be a right brained artist in a predominantly left brain world, which is where you are at working at Party City, but it all comes down to one question.
...What do you REALLY want to do with your life, truthfully?
When you can answer that question and be satisfied that the answer is coming from authentically who you are (as opposed to what you think you need, like money to survive on), then you can GO FOR IT with all you have!
I know it sounds scary, but if you don't try, you'll never know. How does that saying go? "You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
Anyway, really take the time you need to think your goals through. You can map out a marketing plan for your art and still work to earn money to live on, you may just need to schedule your time differently. It may just be a matter of having 2 days off in a row, so you can accomplish more at one time than having to do things in bits and pieces all the time, which seems to leave you feeling fragmented.
I don't know the answers, Anna, only you do...and truthfully, you don't have to act like a grown up until you're 90, and maybe not even then. I don't think anybody really knows what they want to be when they grow up, except for those really focused people who end up doctors, and lawyers, and engineers and bankers.
But for the rest of us, I think we tend to try a lot of different things until we eventually hit on something we like, or we die (whichever comes first). It's your life after all, you can do with it as you like, and only YOU know what will truly make YOU happy!
But we're here to listen to you if you need people to bounce ideas off of anyway. : )
Okay, so maybe that was more like 10 cents. : /
I love you guys!
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